Addendum To Addendum To Wisconsin Post

(6) ILLINOIS 66
WISCONSIN 51

Woo!

Addendum To Wisconsin Post

Even though I may be heading off to 'Sconsin, don't you think for a second that I will be abandoning my Illini. I will be rocking the orange and blue north of the border, you can count on that. Also, do not be lead astray by the image of Bucky Badger on the previous post. His team still sucks.

This will be proven tonight when my beloved 6th-ranked Illini invade the Kohl Center at 7PM Eastern to battle the Badgers. Very important conference game, you should watch because it is on ESPN.

I GOT IN TO WISCONSIN!!!

This is very exciting. Wisconsin is my top choice, and they were the first ones to offer me admission (only two weeks after I submitted my application!). Now I have to apply for an FLAS (Foreign Language Area Studies) fellowship so I can get university funding for my first year of study, which would be most awesome. I can study either Quichua or Yoruba given my interests (I would do Spanish, but I can't get funding for that).

I still have to hear back about my other admission decisions, but I have a hard time believing I will get in to Northwestern, Yale, or Harvard; Maryland won't be better than Wisconsin is; and Michigan is a 50/50 shot. So unless another place offers my an insane amount of money, I'm heading off to Badgerland!

Say Hi to Bucky Badger, my new mascot friend for the next seven years or so. :)

I Actually WAS Living In A Cave Somewhere

Ok so what I am about to say may shock you, so be prepared.

Until last July, I had never heard a Radiohead song. Ever.

When I divulged this information to my coworkers while sitting in a Field Museum lab, they didn't believe me. "You must have heard at least one of their songs," they told me. They went on iTunes, found a recording of Creep, and played it for me.

Nothing.

Karma Police.

Nothing.

Fake Plastic Trees.

Nothing.

You And Whose Army?

Nothing.

Apparently I had gone through the entire 1990s, which included all of my elementary, middle, and high school when everyone and their mother was listening to Radiohead, and I had not heard a single song. My coworkers looked at me like I was some sort of geologic anomaly; or like a Cuban saying "Fidel who?"

I went and checked out Radiohead on Wikipedia (as you can do with the above link) and noticed that their article is gargantuan. It has links to articles about all their alubms, band members, formative eras; it's like they are the greatest band ever.


And now it has all been lost on me. According to my friends, Radiohead was nothing less than the perfect, all-encompassing soundtrack for the generic, slightly pissed-off and distrubed 1990s youth. Their music is intricately interwoven into the life experience of a teenager in the last decade of the 20th century, placing them on a pedestal right next to the one the Beatles for our generation's parents.


And it is all lost on me. My childhood cannot be lived retroactively. Now that so many people are telling me about Radiohead's greatness, my mind cannot accept it. I mean, I like some of thier songs, but I am not about to throw six of their CDs into my car stereo and listen to them for the next decade. Their songs strike me as being as dark as a room with a single, tiny nightlight; as sad as a girl standing alone against a wall during a high school dance.

I think it is interesting to look back on this band that so many people hold to such high esteem, and then look at it from such an original perspective. Because it's not like I knew who they were and then disliked their music; either because of how it sounded or because it was so popular and I needed to rebel. I just never heard it; and it seems so tailor made to the time in which it was produced that it just doesn't do much for me now.

But don't worry about my musical knowledge - I knew Franz Ferdinand was going to be huge five mobths before they started blasting from US radios (mostly because Shewara told me so). And now? Can't get enough of them :)

Look At How Awesome I Am

Because about four hours after this photo was taken, I was standing on top of that mountain in the background (Huayna Picchu) proclaiming my awesomeness to the world. And about thirty seconds after that, I was laying down and trying to catch my breath because I had just hiked up a freakin' mountain. And I hiked up the back side (the side on the left of the photo). Look at how steep that is!

Still, such a fun day. And trip. I shall return soon.

I Am Going To Talk About The Wiretaps

So by now, everyone reading this should be aware of President Bush's "domestic wiretaps" program. The CIA stated, and the President confirmed, that since 2002 they have been conducting a small, concentrated, and focused program to intercept phone and email conversations in andout of the United States by a few hundred people with "known ties to al-Qaeda." Most of these people are citizens of the United States, meaning they are protected both by US laws and the provisions of the United States Constitution.

Many have argued, understandably, that the program is illegal. Usually cited is the 4th Amendement to the US Constitution (1791):

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

This amendment specifically mentions "warrants" obtained by "probable cause" supported by "oath or affirmation" (evidence) as being necessary to conduct any search of any US citizen. Now, warrants can be very difficult to come by. The US legal structure is bureaucratic, time-consuming, and frustrating. Because of this, in 1978 Congress passed the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act which contained a specific provision to make it easier to obtain warrants to conduct domestic surveillance. This was to be done through the power of a Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Court (FISC or FISA Court as it is now known). These courts only serve federal government requests to conduct search and seizure on US citizens so they are much quicker. Even better, warrants can be applied for and granted up to 72 hours after a search and/or seizure is conducted. Since their inception in 1978 through the end of 2004, FISA Courts have received 18,761 warrant requests. Only four of these were rejected (interestingly, all in 2003), and of these four, all were modified and accepted later.

President Bush has not used the FISA Courts. He has conducted these searches without warrants, citing the executive power granted to him post-9/11 as a right to circumvent these courts.

This is where I get suspicious.

"Wait a minute," Bush said, objecting to the word "circumvent." "It's like saying 'You know you're breaking the law.' I'm not. See, that's what you've got to understand. I am upholding my duty and, at the same time, doing so under the law with the Constitution behind me. That's very important for you to understand." (As quoted in the Chicago Tribune, January 27, 2006)

The President has repeatedly echoed similar sentiments since the story broke in December, and never once, as far as I have seen, has he provided evidence for the existence of a law that allows him to do such things. What makes me even more suspicious is what he claims is the scope of the program.

FISA Courts do two things: they issue warrants ridiculously fast, and they have an acceptance rate of 99.997%. Bush has claimed that this group is only focused on "a few hundred individuals." This is interesting. As I stated before, 18,761 warrants have been issued since 1978: an average of 721.5 per year. You only need one warrant per person, so for Bush to say it is only "a few hundred people" must be a lie since "a few hundred people" would actually be a decrease in the number of warrants given out each year. And it really seems like a lie when you find out that 1,754 warrants were granted in 2004, up from 1,724 in 2003. And even if you factor in a thousand other warrants for any number of other things, it still isn't so much that FISA would shut down and need to be bypassed altogether.

Since Bush has been circumventing the FISA Courts, in my opinion it must mean one of two things: either the government is actually applying for many more warrants than FISA can handle, meaning that the program is much larger than he says; or the people they choose to spy on do not have enough evidence against them to get a warrant granted for a wiretap. Which is saying a lot, since every FISA warrant application ever has been accepted.

I am all for protecting the United States. I oppose violence and war and bloodshed in all its forms, and if we have to listen in on somebody's phone conversation to do it, then do it. But under no circumstances am I (or Thomas Jefferson, whose words I am about to borrow) willing to sacrifice personal liberties for national security, because those who would deserve neither.

There Is No Theory Of Evolution

Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

Speaking Of Wanderlust...

I am going to be doing lots of traveling in the near future. I really enjoy this, because traveling is one of my favorite things to do in the entire world - even if I go someplace nearby and decidedly unexotic, like say, Centralia, Illinois. Which just happens to have a Miniature Llama farm.

But check out the schedule:

• Jan 31-Feb 09: Ft. Leonard Wood, Missouri, USA (PSAP survey - my new job!)

• Feb 15-19: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA (Visiting Shewara for her birthday)

• Feb 24-26: Nashville, Tennessee, USA (34th Annual Midwest Conference on Andean and Amazonian Archaeology and Ethnohistory)

• Feb 27-28: Madison, Wisconsin, USA (Visit to campus, and to see a speaker)

• Mar 4-11: Tubingen, Baden-Wurttemberg, Germany (Spring break trip with Shewara)

• Mar 26-31: Las Vegas, Nevada, USA (Golf vacation with my family)

Craziness!

Join Us

Please read the manifesto of an organization I joined today.

Pachakutic

The winds of change are sweeping across Latin America, and this often-ignored region of the world may soon be affecting global politics in a very profound way.

On this day, Evo Morales, an ex-llama herder and coca leaf farmer, became the first indigenous Andean ever to be elected president of Bolivia. This is right on the heels of Chile's shocking election of Michelle Bachelet to that nation's presidency, making her the first female head of state in Latin American history. This is especially interesting since Chile is usually regarded as being the most socially conservative nation in South America. (Also interesting is the fact that North America is now the only habitable continent in the world without a female head of state.)

Both of these leaders represent great shifts in the governing political ideologies of their respective nations. They both have center-left politics, and are greatly concerned with economic reform; Morales especially. Bolivia is especially in need. South America's poorest nation has huge deposits of natural gas, gold, and silver - of which most of the mining rights have been given to large western corporations, so most indigenous and native Bolivians have not reaped the benefits. Morales may change that, and Bachelet may be right on his heels.

All of this sparks a huge change for Latin America. In South America, six of its largest nations (Brazil, Uruguay, Chile, Bolivia, and Venezuela) now have left-leaning governments - and more may be on the way. Ten other Latin American nations have elections this year, many of which may result in the elections of nationalist leaders greatly concerned with putting Latin Americans in charge of their own economies, freeing them from the control of American and European businesses. By the end of 2006, Mexico, Honduras, Haiti, Costa Rica, Venezuela, Colombia, Ecuador, Peru, and Brazil will all hold national elections. And with the precendents set in Bolivia and Chile, most Latin American nations may choose to follow their lead, further securing a unified political agenda for the region, giving it autonomy from outside political and economic influence like never before. Latin America services many western needs of which we may not be aware. Venezuela is world's 5th-largest exporter of oil, the Andes and Mexico hold the richest silver and gold deposits in the world, as well as the aforementioned natural gas, and Colombian and Brazilian coffee growers account for the vast majority of the world's supply.

If the results of all of these upcoming elections go as planned, resulting in the ousting of many west-yielding leaders and ushering in their more nationalist, liberal replacements, the United States and Europe may have to contend with a Latin America that can demand its own prices for the commodities it produces. The region will grow more wealthy and more powerful as a direct result.

This may not happen in the next few years, but the change is definitely happening. And it should make you happy too. Concerned about illegal immigration? Financially comfortable Latin Americans living in stable economies and governments won't need to cross any borders.

The next major election is in Peru on April 9. President Alejandro Toledo, a native speaker of Aymara, will soon be ousted along with his ridiculous economic policies and poor excuse for a government. A liberal successor? Stay tuned to find out.

Egypt Makes Me Happy, And So Do Other Things

I was sitting on my couch this morning, watching an excellent A&E documentary about the history of the archaeology of ancient Egypt when it struck me how calm I was feeling. Maybe it was because of what was on the television screen. Egypt was my very first love; since I was little, I wanted to be an Egyptologist but unceremoniously abandoned that dream during sophomore year of college to pursue tens of other fleeting interests until I arrived at my current career goal. But it is always nice to go back to what you loved for so long; just sitting and learning about Egypt again fit my mind like a worn-out baseball cap. It was very relaxing.

But at the same time, I am gradually getting a very relaxed attitude about the future. When I was very young, I used to never worry about anything because I was so supremely confident everything would always work out. I still have that feeling, but a lost a little of it between grad school applications and being out of a job. Now that I got re-hired at an archaeology firm, I feel better about graduate school too. Because even on the off chance I don't get in anywhere this year, I know I can reapply next year and learn from the possible mistakes I made on these applications. Maybe I can write a better personal statement. Maybe I can get into a better school.

In any event, right now I am choosing not to worry about it. Pretty soon I get to go see Shewara for her birthday, and as always, we have lots of fun things planned. Then we are taking a trip, probably to Germany, for her spring break. Then I get to go play some golf in Las Vegas, which may sound boring to some, but I love the mental concentration, stamina, and unending zen attitude success that golf demands. And by the time I am done with all these little trips, I will have received a letter from all six of my schools.

These pyramids are five thousand years old, and to this day remain the largest man-made sturctures on the planet. You don't see them worrying. So why should I?

Wanderlust

"I haven't got any special religion this morning. My God is the God of Walkers. If you walk hard enough, you probably don't need any other god."


-Bruce Chatwin, In Patagonia, p. 33

More Adventures In Insanity Land

The landscape is a combination of small, flat-topped hills blanketed with dying grass and patches of evergreen forest. It is overcast; the sky is one large ominous gray cloud being stirred by the cold, biting winds.

My family (in this case, my youngest brother and my father), are playing a game that can only be described as badminton/lacrosse when I approach them to inform them of the phone calls I have been receiving. For the past few hours, I've been receiving calls on my cell phones from four people: two college friends (Lauren and Aubrey), Shewara, and another girl I cannot remember (though I have a sneaking suspicion it was my friend Jessica). They call to tell me that they were buried alive by my family. As my brother and father are playing their game, I ask them, very calmly, why they buried my friends. "Because we thought they were dead," they respond. For some reason I accept this answer, and recruit them to go dig up my friends.

First we go get Shewara, since she is the only one of these four people I speak to on a regular basis, or even have spoken to in the past six months. We drive to where she is buried, and dig up her coffin. She pops out, fine as can be, with a noticeably peeved look on her face. Shewara's safety being secured, we drove to get the other three.

Aubrey and [Jessica] were buried together in a different location, I'm guessing about five miles away in non-dream terms. Neither of them are buried in coffins; they were placed straight in the ground. This section of my adventure is very hazy, as it seems I jumped to getting Lauren after resucing these two, even though I do not have a specific recollection of digging them up. I simply know that we did.

Lauren's rescue is incredibly vivid. We drove to a remote area where there was an old cemetery on top of a hill. The hill was surrounded by a dense evergreen forest. The landscape and weather are very noticeable: it is cold, cloudy, and somewhat scary (if you ever saw The Ring it is something like that). We head up the hill to get Lauren, when we notice a black-haired woman, probably in her late twenties, weeping next to a gravestone. It reads:

MY LOVING HUSBAND
MAY 23, 2000

The woman makes eye contact with us, and then watches intently as we begin to dig only a few feet away from her husband's grave. The digging we do is more like archaeology than actual digging: we use trowels instead of shovels, and kneel on the ground rather than stand. We never actually dig into the surface that much; it appears as soon as we started scraping dirt, Lauren's box appeared on the surface of the ground.

Her Sam's Club Box.

For some reason, Lauren had been buried in one of those flat carboard trays that you get when you buy groceries at Sam's Club. In the tray with her was a variety of grocery items: mostly cans of food (soup, and I distinctly remember pasta sauce and crushed tomatoes). There may have also been some cheese and some bags of snacks. In any event, Lauren herself was on the right side of the tray, sealed inside of a large potato chip bag. The bag was much larger than a normal size, but still nowhere near big enough to hold a full-grown human being, which made me wonder how she managed enough maneuvering to place a cell phone call. I leaned over, opened the bag,

Then I woke up.

An Introduction To My Adventures In Insanity Land

My dreams are insanely weird. I didn't really realize this until recently when I started telling my dreams to other people. My dreams look like real-life manifestations of a surrealist painting, while other people tend to use real things and real places. The only logical conclusion? My dreams take place in a world called Insanity Land. So, from now on, when I have one of my fun adventurs in Insanity Land, I will be sure to tell you all about it. Here's the first one:

I'm in a suburban subdivision. I am walking down a black, curvy, uphill street on a very dark and stormy night. The landscape kind of rises up before me like some sort of cartoon. It is raining, but I am staying dry despite my lack of umbrella. The street is lined with houses, none of which look like houses I have ever seen before. Each one is painted either red, yellow, green, (once in a while blue). They are shaped in these odd, polygonal geometric forms that look like three-dimensional renderings of graph-paper doodles you made in high school geometry class. Suddenly, I find myself inside one of the houses. (I didn't actually walk inside a house, I just kind of appeard inside. I don't know which house it was.) I knew I was there to watch a horror movie with my friend Jeff (I have no friend Jeff). I do not know what Jeff looks like, nor did I ever see him in the dream, but I know for a fact we sat down and started watching the movie on his couch. We never said a word to each other. I never saw the movie on the screen, but I knew we had watched it. At a random point in time, I looked over to notice Jeff was not on the couch (the fact that he had never really been there didn't seem to be a problem at the time). I got up from the couch, and walked into the kitchen area where I saw a clear garbage bag filled with unbuttered popcorn leaning against the corner between the back window and the counter. There was a green frog with extremely long legs swimming inside the garbage bag. I immediately concluded that this was my friend Jeff, who apparently had been turned into this frog as a result of seeing the movie.

Then I woke up.

For Some Reason, I Am A Lucky Bastard (or, My Life Is A Fluke)

Things just seem to come to me. Don't know why, don't know how, but they do. The best things, or the most fortunate (best and fortunate can be different) tend to happen to me by complete accident, often times as a result of something stupid I did.

For example, I met Shewara almost entirely because I chose to wear a very specific shirt on a very specific day. She saw me wearing it, noted that she had seen ones like it elsewhere, and we started up a conversation. If I had been wearing any other t-shirt out of the fifty I have, I would probably still be single, and rather bored.

Or when I was flying to Jacksonville to meet my Dad for some golf, back in 1999. I went to the gate without my boarding pass, just like my mother told me to do. I had a ticket stub, which apparently I was supposed to turn in to get my boarding pass, and my Mom said that was all I needed (apparently she, like I, was not familiar with the whole "boarding pass" thing.) So when I tried to get on the plane, they stopped me for not having a boarding pass. Asked me where it was. I had no idea; I was 15 and inexperienced with air travel. I was traveling alone, so no parents to help. And the plane was full - since I hadn't gotten a pass, they gave away my seat. Just as they were about to send me away, a man in a business suit left the plane, saying he had an urgent matter and had to leave. So they gave me his seat. In First Class. Even though I paid for a coach ticket. Even better,it was the first row window seat. Even got my very own individual salt and pepper shakers for my lemon and herb chicken. Plus a wide selection of movies for my viewing pleasure, and ice cream toppings for my mint chocolate chip.

So it should come as no surprise that I got a job today, basically because I chose to check my email at the exact time one of my friends was checking hers. I was wandering toward my lunch date at U of I when I decided to stop in the anthropology computer lab, just to check some things. Just as I was getting up to leave, my friend stopped in and sat down next to me. I hadn't seen her in six months, so I asked her where she was going then, since I had an hour to kill. She had to make a quick stop at a small baby shower for a department professor, and then go to class. So I decided to go as her date, just for shits. While I am at the party, I run into one of my old department secretary friends, who also happens to run the scheduling and hiring for the public archaeology program the department runs. She sees me, and immediately says:

"Matt! Do you need a job?"

I think about it.

"Why yes, as a matter of fact I do."

So she hired me right there. Doing survery archaeology work across the state, for excellent pay, and I actually MAKE money on my commute, rather than lose it. The scheduling is infinitely flexible, so I can take time off for trips whenever I want. I even get to work with a bunch of old friends. It was almost too perfect.

Like I said, one big fluke.

Tea!

Shewara and I are up-and-coming tea connoisseurs. Tea has lots of antioxidants, so it is real good for you. Here is a list of the teas I have in my house right now:

15 Royal King: New Wei Ge (Men Plus King Power)
1 Stash: Double Spice Chai Black
1 Stash: Raspberry & White Decaf
1 St. Dalfour Black Cherry
30 St. Dalfour: Strawberry
1 Ten Ren: Green
3 Ten Ren: Jasmine
1 Ten Ren: Oolong
1 Ten Ren: Pouchong
1 Trader Joe's: Chai

All Done With Applications

You will note that I did not use the University of Wisconsin's official seal (like I did for the other five schools) in its post. This is because UW-Madison's seal is ugly as hell. If you really want to see it, click here.

So I am finally finished. Hundreds of dollars in application fees, days and days of writing personal statements, plus phone and email conversations with tons of professors - some of thought I was awesome, some of them thought I sucked, many didn't even respond to me. Despite all my effort, there is still a chance I may not get in anywhere. Every school I applied to has an accpetance rate somewhere in the neighborhood of 10-20%. If I don't get in, I will have to repeat this entire process again next autumn/winter, until I get in somewhere.

I will not know anything until March, the usual time the acceptance/rejection letters are sent out. It kind of sucks knowing my fate is now out of my hands, but I've done all I can with the time I have to make sure I gave these schools the best impression of me possible. If they don't like me, it is their loss for not having the greatest art historian of the 21st century attached to their program.

But now, the great waiting begins.....

Application #6 of 6: Complete

Department of Art History

also

Visual Culture Program

Tossing and Turning

I haven't been sleeping well recently.

Last night I had a dream that four of my friends, including Shewara, were buried alive and I had to go dig them up. This is an indication that my dreamcatcher above my bed is not doing a very good job. Or that I am beginning to stress out about things.

Yesterday I lost my job at the Field Museum. From all indications they wanted to keep me. They loved the job I did with their coin collection, I was repsected and befriended by the staff, and people always seemed genuinely happy to see me when I stopped in to say "Hi." After the coin job, I was waiting to hear back from FAMSI about a grant I submitted to work on the museum's Maya collection from Belize - actually a very important project that many people wanted done. The grant was for a good chunk of money, all of which would be coming my way, setting me up well for when I head off to graduate school.

One problem.

I didn't get the grant. This was shocking, because by all indications it was exactly the type of project FAMSI was looking to fund. So what could have been a steady, set job that paid well working at a great museum has now been converted into sleepless nights for me and sitting at home the next day. So now the job search begins.

There are a few library positions scattered throughout the city which I can apply for. UChicago's Smart Museum of Art is actually in need of a registrar, a position I am more than qualified for, but I can't exactly take that job and then leave six months later to go to grad school. So tomorrow, I am heading downtown to spend the day looking for a job at any vaguely cultural or artistic institution. The bottom line is that I refuse to get a lame retail job in my hometown. I don't want to be elitist, but I feel it is beneath me. I didn't go to college for four years to shelve books at my local Borders for seven dollars an hour.

In the midst of all this, I am slowly but surely finishing my personal statement for my Wisconsin application. I am completely rewriting it for my #1 choice school, and I must say it is a work of art at this point. I've been struggling for months to write my ideas down in a coherent, yet impacting way, and I feel I may have finally done it. I hope the people up in Madison think the same thing.

Ok, time to try to go to sleep. Maybe if I flip my dreamcatcher around it will work a little better.

Cosas del Ano Nuevo (New Year Things)

Happy New Year! I feel odd living in a 2006 where I was promised flying cars yet I am stuck in an SUV. Maybe next year.

I got some awesome Christmas presents. Shewara's family snazzed up my wardrobe with some classy grad student-type clothes, my brothers gave me some Illini-themed presents, like tickets and a DVD and a jersey, and Shewara gave us (as in she and I) an awesome Japanese tea pot. Very good all around.

New Year's was fun too. Shewara and I went to a small gathering in downtown Chicago with some of her friends. They're all nice liberal college nerds - exactly our crowd. We had cheesecake and pie and discussed topics from future jobs (lame) to Andreas Gursky (cooler) to Eddie Izzard (awesomest). I also got a present of some Indian coins from the party's host, which was very thoughtful.

In the coming week, Shewara and I have bunches planned. Thursday, we are driving down to Chambana to see the perenially-anticipated Illini-Spartans matchup. The 6th-ranked Illini (14-0) will face 7th-ranked Michigan State (12-2) on national TV at 8PM central time. Watch for us! While down there, we are also gonna stop by my favorite Mexican restaurant (I've been there at least ten times, yet can never remember the name), and then hit up the tiny town of Melvin, Illinois to attend world-famous Bubba's Bar and Grill. The best thing about Bubba's is that they only take cash, and the nearest ATM is fifteen miles away. Shewara and I learned that the hard way.

As for now, I am finishing up my last grad school application (Wisconsin) and waiting to hear if the Field Museum can re-hire me. It depends on the status of a grant I need to get funded, so I'm heading there tomorrow to check in and see what the deal is. Hopefully things are looking up.

Lastly, some New Year's Resolutions:

1. Do some situps. I used to be on the verge of a sixpack, and now I have a 1 1/2 pack at best. Must fix that.

2. Get organized. I need to file things better and keep track of my bank statements and whatnot. I have everything, but the problem is finding where I put it.

3. Lastly, I need more friend contact. I don't keep in touch with my friends enough, which sucks because I have some great ones. I need to buy an address book and write birthdays in it, and then distribute cards and emails and presents accordingly.

And you all can keep in touch with me too.